DEAR FAITH

Dear Faith,

Yesterday I was in a car with someone who was born around the same time dad was. Looking at him I could only guess the type of man dad would have been today. I felt the love of a father from this man. It wasn’t a longing or a craving for anything. It just felt good to have a physical reminder of how paternal affection feels like.

I know you cannot see how life continues without a father. The thought of living after your old man has breathed his last due to a torturous battle with cancer is eating you up. The pain he felt. The fatigue.  The despair. You don’t know who you pity more; yourself after losing a parent or him during that merciless suffering.

It will take a while for you to come to terms with the situation. In fact, just when you think you are okay, you will see something or someone that reminds you of him and you will realize that you never were. You will start thinking that time only deepens your wounds and you will have to wake up every single day to the realization that it was not a bad dream; he is gone.

You will not notice how or when you get better. You will not be able to say that at a particular moment on a certain day the pain was less and you were able to survive without a second of despair. But somehow with time, your smiles will become more genuine and that dark pit in your heart will start becoming lighter.

You will still feel the heartache. Oh, how that ache will come when you least expect and crush your innocent soul! Sometimes you will be apologetic and guilty that you have moved on and forgotten about someone you loved dearly. These dark days will come in plenty but they will find a tenacious girl who refuses to be put down.

The fact that your father’s life ended is heartbreaking but refuse to pause yours. Be cheerful and hardworking the way he taught you to be. Just by looking at the people around you and realizing that you have not lost everything will encourage you and let you know that you are not alone.

Appreciate the time you had with a father as good as him even though his time on earth came to a stop. This will make you realize that you have so many blessings and whether or not you lose them later on, a part of them is alive in you.

Future Faith.

 

 

Previous Next